Alright, Alright, Alright
by Amy-Violet
Summary: What if Sam didn't get rid of McConaughey just because Mercedes told him to? For Blam Week 2016, Animals Bring them Together Day


Mercedes and Sam don't know Blaine is in the kitchen. He's not trying to eavesdrop or anything, it's just that the acoustics are really good and he can hear everything they're saying.

He should go, or at least make some noise so they know they're not alone, as soon as he realizes they're arguing. But he just gets so...so _angry_...that he's sort of frozen.

The thing is, he knows Mercedes has a point. He knows she's probably actually "right," in fact. Spontaneously adopting a dog—against the express wishes of someone you live with—is not really the right thing to do. For lots of reasons.

But when he hears Mercedes claim that they both agreed Sam can't take care of a dog, he just wants to run in there and defend Sam. For one thing, Blaine knows for a fact that that was what _Mercedes_ said and that Sam did _not_ agree. And for another thing, it's bullcrap. Sam is perfectly capable of taking care of a dog. Blaine is tired of Mercedes and everyone else underestimating Sam.

It turns out Blaine might be guilty of underestimating his best friend too, though, because Sam doesn't need him to rush to his defense. Sam is actually sticking up for himself, which he seems to do so rarely. Mercedes _does_ act like she thinks Sam is a joke. She's so condescending to him, and Blaine is so happy that Sam is finally calling her on it. Now he wants to run in and hug Sam and say, "You tell her!"

Sam does tell her, and he tells her way more eloquently than Blaine could have. Mercedes kinda sorta backs off some of the more outrageous things she said about Sam, but she doesn't back off from her position that the dog has to go. Sam doesn't agree, but he doesn't disagree. Blaine's pretty sure he'll end up giving in.

~o0o~

Blaine wakes up to something cold and wet against his ear. He opens his eyes and there's McConaughey, sniffing his face and wagging his...not just his tail, really, but his whole lower body. "Good morning," he says, petting the little furball's head.

"Crap, did he wake you?" Blaine hears from behind him. He turns to see Sam, bent down and tying his shoelaces. "McConaughey, I said we'd go in a minute, as soon as I get my shoes on. Couldn't you be quiet for one minute, buddy?"

"It's fine," Blaine says. "I was gonna get up soon anyway." He continues petting McConaughey, finding a spot between the dog's shoulder blades that the little guy seems to really like. "Hey, are you taking him for a walk? Can I come with?"

"You want to? Seriously?"

"Yeah, of course. Just let me throw something on."

"Okay, great. Do you mind if we wait for you outside? I think he really needs to pee."

Blaine goes to the bathroom, wondering if McConaughey thinks it's unfair that everyone else gets to pee before he does. If Sam did go first, which Blaine is not actually sure of; maybe he thought it would be unfair too. Blaine throws on sweatpants and sneakers and a Yankees cap to hide his ungelled hair and joins Sam and McConaughey outside. "Do you have to run back in for a second?" he asks Sam, because now he can't help but wonder if _Sam_ has to pee. "I can wait out here with him if you do."

Sam looks at him curiously. "Why? Did I forget something?"

"No, I was just wondering...Never mind."

They're about halfway down the block before Sam says, "Mercedes isn't going to let me keep him."

"Yeah. I kind of overheard you guys yesterday. I'm sorry."

"Oh." They walk a little farther. McConaughey finds a sign pole that's absolutely fascinating, and while he's busy circling and sniffing it, Sam adds, "He's just so _cute_! Don't you think he's cute?"

"He's freaking adorable." McConaughey has the leash wrapped around the tree now, and he's stuck, and he turns to Sam with this help-me look. Sam walks around the pole himself to get the leash unwrapped and is himself pretty freaking adorable. "You know when Mercedes asked you who would walk him and stuff when she's busy and you're busy, and you said you'd hire a dog walker?"

"Yeah?"

"Why didn't you say you'd ask me?"

"Well, you know. You're busy with NYADA and your showcase and Kurt and everything."

"Right. Yeah, but...I'm still more than happy to help whenever I can." Blaine doesn't want to make any of this about himself, so he doesn't say that it kind of broke his heart when Sam seemingly forgot he was even there. Especially when he said he was going to be lonely when Mercedes was on tour and he'd be in the brownstone all by himself.

"And, I mean...what if Rachel actually gets that sitcom and moves to L.A.?"

"Do you really think she'd just up and quit _Funny Girl_ , which was her lifelong dream to star in, before her contract is even up? For a long-shot like a TV pilot? It seems like such a bad career move."

"I don't pretend to understand what Rachel's thinking, but she does seem to want it, and she always gets what she wants. So when she moves out of the loft, aren't you going to move in with Kurt?"

"She doesn't _always_ get what she wants."

"Okay, if you say so. But _if_ she does. Are you gonna move back to the loft?"

"I guess I haven't really thought about it." And Blaine guesses he should. Last time he moved in with Kurt he hadn't thought about it first, it had just been a sort of foregone conclusion. He doesn't want to make that mistake again.

~o0o~

When Blaine tells Kurt later about the whole McConaughey situation, Kurt surprises him by taking Mercedes's side.

Well, no, that's not true. It's not actually a surprise at all.

Blaine can't really object when Kurt raises valid issues like how much time and attention and money caring for a dog can take, or how it's really not fair for Mercedes, who didn't even want the dog, to have her things destroyed by him. (Blaine could have left out the details of Mercedes's hair and shoes, but he believes in being fair.) But then Kurt says, "And _Sam_ of all people! He can't even take care of himself!"

"That's so unfair, Kurt! Sam took care of his whole family when he was still a teenager."

"Oh, please. He enjoyed being a stripper. He's an underwear model now, that should tell you something." While Blaine is sputtering in disbelief, Kurt goes on: "And I don't need to remind you how he lived on our couch for _so long_."

"No, you don't need to remind me, because you're still bringing it up constantly, months later."

"Why are you getting so defensive? And take it easy on my pillow, please."

Blaine hadn't noticed that he's picked up one of Kurt's throw pillows and is squeezing it. He sets it down and answers, "Because Sam is sweet and caring and generous and I'm tired of people taking him for granted and not giving him the respect he deserves."

"I'm not saying he's not a nice guy, but that's not the same as being a responsible pet owner."

"Well, you know what? I think you're wrong. In fact... You know, Mercedes's studio is probably not going to pay for Sam and me to live in that brownstone when she goes off on tour. So I was thinking..."

"Sam and that dog are not coming to live here!"

"No, I wasn't thinking that." Seeing as how Kurt is still complaining about Sam having lived with them briefly _without_ a dog, that scenario isn't something he would consider putting anyone through. "I was thinking that Sam and I should look for a new place together. Maybe near a dog park or something. And I can help Sam take care of McConaughey, and—"

"I thought that you'd move back here when Mercedes left."

Blaine does realize this time that he's squeezing the pillow again, but he doesn't set it down. "Well, but we tried living together, and it didn't work."

"Yeah, but that was with a loft full of people. Rachel might be leaving too, Blaine. Am I supposed to live by myself?"

"I mean...you've been implying pretty much constantly since I got to New York that you feel smothered by me. And I just hate to think of Sam having to take care of that dog all by himself. Or worse, what if he can't afford a place by himself where he can keep him? He's so cute, Kurt! He's got these great big puppy dog eyes that just gaze right into your soul, and when he looks at you it's like he's just saying, 'Please love me!'"

Kurt snatches the pillow from Blaine and holds it tight to his own chest. He studies Blaine for a minute and asks, "This is the dog you're talking about, right? With the soul-gazing, love-me eyes?"

"You should see him, Kurt! Artie showed me a picture of Sam and McConaughey at this...I think it's called an agility course, and—"

"So let me get this straight. You're choosing a dog over me."

"That's absurd, Kurt. You and I don't live together now. How is that even—"

"And not, like, your childhood pet who you've loved your whole life. It would still be pretty messed up to choose your pet over your fiancé, but at least if it were something like that I could understand your emotional attachment. But we're talking about a random dog you didn't know of the existence of until yesterday."

"But I'm not choosing anyone over you! I keep trying to tell you—"

"Aren't you, though? Can you really tell me that it's the dog you're so smitten with? Can you tell me this has nothing to do with that crush you had on Sam?: The one you assured me before we got back together that you were over?"

~o0o~

When Blaine returns home he finds Sam lying on the couch playing with McConaughey. The sight cheers him up way more than it probably should. "Hey, guys!" he announces. McConaughey's ears perk up, and he springs out of Sam's grip, leaps over the back of the couch, and runs to greet Blaine.

"Sorry, man," Sam says, as the dog puts his front paws up on Blaine's legs, clamoring for attention.

"Don't apologize, I love him!" Blaine picks McConaughey up and gives him a happy head scratch. To Sam he says, "Hey, any chance this little guy's due for another walk?"

"No, but I'm sure he won't mind." Sam gets up and gets the leash. As soon as McConaughey sees it he squirms out of Blaine's arms, tail wagging furiously.

Outside, one of their neighbors is walking a black lab, who McConaughey tries to play with, seemingly having no idea of the size difference between the two of them. The lab doesn't seem to mind either, but the lab's owner is in a hurry, so the dogs' playtime is cut very short. As they continue on, Blaine says, "So, I'm not moving to the loft."

"Really? Even if Rachel moves out?"

"Really." Blaine feels like he should probably mention what happened with Kurt, but for some reason he doesn't want to yet. "But I am going to look for a new apartment."

"Dude! Why?"

"I'm pretty sure we can't keep living here after Mercedes goes on tour. I mean, why would the record company keep putting up her friends when she's not here anymore?"

"Oh. Crap, I should have thought of that." They stop to let McConaughey sniff a tree. "So I guess I have to find somewhere else too."

"Do you want to look for a place together? Somewhere that allows dogs?"

Sam's face lights up. "We _could_ keep him then, couldn't we? And Mercedes can't even say anything about it. Um...I can't afford half of anything as nice as where we are now, though."

"Yeah, I know. Me neither." Blaine does get money from his parents, but not _that_ much. On the other hand, he's managed to save a bit since lucking into such an impossibly cushy living situation for a while.

~o0o~

They've already found a place by the very next day. Well, they've found a place that they can look at the next day. It's in a decent location and in their price range, but Blaine spots some rat droppings in the kitchen, so they pass.

As they're walking home—without McConaughey this time—Sam asks, "Are you sure you don't mind sharing a one-bedroom?"

"No, it really was the rats that made me say no."

Sam laughs. "Yeah, no, I didn't mean that place. I meant in general...we're not going to find a two-bedroom that we can afford."

"Yeah, but we share a bedroom now, so..."

"Right. But there's more room in general now."

"And more people in general too."

"Yeah, okay. Just...well, I guess you and Kurt usually get busy at his place now anyway, so it won't be that different. I'm just making sure."

Blaine still isn't really ready to mention it, but he can't let that comment just stand. It wouldn't be honest. "It will be different, actually. Kurt and I...I don't want to make a big deal out of it or anything, but we broke up."

Sam stops in his tracks. "Don't want to make a big deal out of it? Dude, that's, like, the definition of a big deal. Are you okay?"

Blaine stops too, forcing a couple behind him to swerve at the last minute to avoid crashing into him and Sam. "Yeah, I am, actually. I don't know, I always thought I'd be freaking out if this happened, but I actually feel pretty calm about it. I don't know, maybe the freakout is coming, but somehow I don't think so."

"So what happened?"

Blaine replays the fight in his head. He tries to think of a way to explain it to Sam without freaking him out, but he can't. "I'm sorry, Sam, I really don't want to talk about it yet."

Sam puts his hand on Blaine's shoulder. "If you can't talk about it, then you're not really okay with it."

"Mmm..." Blaine wonders if Sam has a point. He thinks he probably does, but on the other hand, it's hard to concentrate with Sam touching him. "Maybe. I feel like I'm okay with it, but I also feel like I don't want to talk about it. So I guess you can draw your own conclusions from that."

~o0o~

Sam is cleaning the carpet where McConaughey had an accident when Mercedes knocks on the bedroom door. "Again?" she asks, stepping inside and scrunching up her nose, even though there's nothing to smell anymore.

"He's still learning," Sam says. He pops into the bathroom to throw away the paper towels and wash his hands. When he comes back, he adds, "Blaine was reading about kennel training. Like, they don't like to go where they sleep, and it's not even cruel or anything because they like having a cozy little place when no one's around to play with them, so we're gonna try that."

"You're planning to buy him a kennel?"

"Yeah, we're getting one this afternoon. We'll put some blankets and stuff in there—he should love it."

"Baby, I'm all for keeping him from making more messes in the house, but since he's only going to be here a couple more days, do you really want to spend a lot of money on him?"

"Yeah, about that...We're gonna keep him. Me and Blaine."

Mercedes tenses. "Sam, we agreed..."

"No. Actually, you agreed." Sam picks up McConaughey and holds him protectively to his chest.

"You can't just bring a dog into my home without me agreeing to it."

"Yeah, I shouldn't have done that. You're right. And you're right that this is _your_ home, not mine."

"Sam, I didn't mean it like—"

"You did, but it's okay." She's right, it's her record company putting _her_ up, not him and Blaine. "Me and Blaine are looking for our own place. Somewhere that we can keep McConaughey."

"You're _what_?"

That's weird, Sam didn't expect her to be upset about it. It only makes sense, what with her leaving soon. "Yeah, we're looking at another place today."

"You are going to leave me for a _dog_?"

"What _leave you_? You're going on—"

"I did not sign up to date a man-child who puts some pooping rodent above me."

The only word Sam really hears from that sentence is _man-child_. He blurts out, "No, you want a child-child who can't think for himself and just does everything you say!"

Mercedes actually gasps and holds her hand to her chest. "That is _not_ what I want."

"Well then what do you want? Because it's sure as hell not me."

Mercedes is silent. Sam doesn't know what her expression is because he's looking at McConaughey, not at Mercedes. McConaughey loves him, he knows that. Blaine loves him. Both of them in different ways from how he tried to get Mercedes to love him, but still.

"Is this about sex?" Mercedes finally asks.

Sam sighs. McConaughey is squirming so Sam sets him down on his bed, where he proceeds to circle around a few times and then roll over on his back for a tummy rub. Sam sits next to him to give him one. "It's not about sex."

"Then what's it about?"

It hits Sam very suddenly that he's about to break up with Mercedes. It hits him very suddenly that he's had all these thoughts in the back of his head for a long time now, and now that they're suddenly in the front, he has to get them out. He doesn't know how to do it, though. The only person he ever broke up with was Quinn, and that was because she made out with Finn. This is a totally different situation; Mercedes hasn't done anything "wrong," so he has to be gentle about this. "Look, it's not your fault. I tried to force us to be a couple; I should have seen from the beginning that you weren't interested. I mean, you _told_ me you weren't interested. I just, I guess I never really got over the feeling that we never really had a chance in high school, that it was because of my family moving away, and that if the circumstances were better we'd work. We just don't. I mean, we gave it a try, and...I mean it just never really..."

Mercedes bites her lips together, like maybe she's trying not to cry. "If I didn't have to go on tour..."

Sam shakes his head because he knows that wouldn't make any difference. It wouldn't suddenly make her respect him. It wouldn't suddenly make her fall in love with him. It wouldn't suddenly make him fall in love with her again. He's been trying to all this time, had even told himself that he _was_ in love with her, but...he was just chasing something he thought he'd missed out on before. That's clear to him all of a sudden.

He decides not to say any of this, though. If Mercedes wants to believe it's because of the tour, then he can let her have that. He says, "But you do have to go on tour. So I think it's time for us to admit that it's over between us."

Mercedes starts to cry. It surprises Sam a little, honestly. It makes him think maybe she really does care about him more than he thought. But then there's also a part of him that thinks maybe she's not really sad about the break-up itself but just because she's the one getting dumped for once. And then he thinks that's mean and he doesn't want to think mean things about her (even if they're maybe true), because he's not mad at her. Not really. So he stands up and hugs her and holds her until she stops crying...which isn't actually all that long. And then she asks him when he and Blaine are moving out.

~o0o~

Blaine's in his bed, looking at apartment listings, and Sam is in his, petting the curled up puppy dog nestled under his armpit. "I guess I should make him sleep in the kennel instead of in bed with me, huh?" he says.

"Probably," Blaine answers, not looking up from the laptop.

"Yeah, I know." Sam gives McConaughey a little scritch on the chin. "But not until I'm gonna actually go to sleep. That won't spoil him or anything, right?"

This time Blaine does look over at the two of them, and he smiles indulgently. "I'm sure it's fine."

"Yeah, that's what I thought too," says Sam, not to Blaine but to McConaughey, in baby talk.

After a while Blaine gets up and puts the laptop on the desk. "We should find out how long we have until Mercedes's record company is going to kick us out. If they don't make us leave right when she does, maybe we'll have better luck finding a place."

"You didn't see _any_ apartments?"

"I mean, there were a couple that might work if we had no other choice, but if we do have extra time I'd rather keep looking."

"Oh."

Blaine, already in his pajamas, goes into the bathroom to brush his teeth. Sam carries McConaughey to the kennel and settles him inside. He forces himself to ignore the dog's whining as he takes his pants and flannel shirt off and settles himself in his own bed. Miraculously, McConaughey only continues to fuss for about a minute after Blaine turns off the light. Apparently he accepts that they're all going to sleep now. So Sam really wants to stay quiet and not risk confusing the little guy, but what he hasn't gotten around to telling Blaine about all day is actually pretty important. "You asleep yet?" he whispers.

"I _just_ turned off the light."

"Yeah, right. I know." A noise comes from the kennel, but it's not whining, it's more like McConaughey shifting around inside. "I just think...I mean, I'm sorry if we can't find a super amazing apartment in time, but I kinda think we should try to move out as soon as possible. Like preferably even before Mercedes goes on tour."

"Uh. But don't you think, now that he'll be in the kennel whenever he's not being supervised, she'll be more okay with him? It's not for that long."

"Yeah, it's, um...not the dog she's not totally okay with anymore."

Blaine turns the light back on and asks, "What!?" McConaughey lets out a whine. Blaine turns the light off again and repeats the question more calmly. "What?"

Sam is glad to have the room dark again. "So, like, don't be mad at me, but I wasn't really thinking about what it would mean for us finding an apartment, but, um...me and Mercedes broke up."

Blaine is over in Sam's bed then...well, _on_ his bed, actually, like on top of the covers. Sam sits up and Blaine puts an arm around his shoulder and asks, "Are you okay? Why didn't you tell me? Was she really that mad about the dog or was it something else?"

Sam leans back, trapping Blaine's arm between his neck and the wall. "Actually, I ended it."

"You did!?"

"Why do you sound so surprised?" Sam actually knows exactly why Blaine sounds so surprised though, and while Blaine is silent, probably trying to think of an inoffensive way to say it, Sam decides to help him out. "Never mind, I know. I've always followed after her like a puppy dog, no matter how little interest she showed in me."

"No, Sam, I wasn't..."

"You weren't going to say it like that, I know. But it's still true."

"Well..." Blaine says. "I happen to love puppy dogs." He reaches down as if to pet McConaughey, but McConaughey is in the kennel, and so he awkwardly pats Sam's thigh instead.

Sam laughs half-heartedly. "Yeah, me too. Sorta why I'm in this mess." He looks over at McConaughey and, even though he can't see more than the outline of the kennel in the dim light, he feels bad for trying to blame him, so he immediately corrects himself. "I mean, not really though. The whole fight over the dog maybe brought up some stuff I'd been trying to ignore, but...but it's probably better not to keep ignoring it anyway."

Blaine rubs Sam's shoulder reassuringly, or at least it's probably meant to be reassuring, but it's weird because Blaine's whole body stiffens at the same time. He says, "Yeah. Speaking of things that are probably better out in the open..." And then he extracts his arm from behind Sam, gets off his bed, and goes back to his own.

"Um, did I do something?" Sam asks.

"No, no! I just...I want to tell you something and I thought maybe you'd think it's creepy if I told you while I was in your bed."

"I promise I wouldn't."

"Well, wait until you hear what it is."

"Okay..." Sam is pretty worried now.

Blaine settles himself under his blankets. "So, it's about why Kurt and I broke up."

"Okay..."

"He, um...he dumped me because he thinks I'm still hung up on you."

"Dude! Just tell him you're not!"

McConaughey makes a whuffling sound.

"Duh, you already did that. I'll tell him then! I'll tell him how ever since you got it in your head to propose to him—which was a great idea, by the way, go gay rights!—you've been nothing but bro-like with me. I mean, you were always only bro-like with me, but you don't even look at me the way you did for a while there, so...You want me to call him right now?"

Blaine clears his throat. "The thing is...he's, uh...he's not actually wrong."

Sam's not sure what to say to that. Does Blaine mean...? Is there anything else he _could_ mean? He realizes he has to say something. "I thought I would know if you still..."

"I think I almost convinced _myself_ I didn't, but...yeah."

"Well, so...I mean, I still think it's very unfair of Kurt. It's not like you _did_ anything wrong. I can definitely tell him that for you!"

"He didn't accuse me of doing anything."

"Well then? He thinks you're _going_ to cheat? He thinks I'd help you cheat?"

"He didn't say that exactly. He just said he'd feel uncomfortable with me living with you, given my...feelings."

"But that's so unfair!"

Blaine's quiet for a moment. Then he says, "Is it, though? Wouldn't you have second thoughts about marrying someone if you knew they were in l-... had feelings for someone else, feelings that they'd had for almost two years, and then they chose to live with that other person instead of you?"

This time Sam's the one who's momentarily speechless. When he does speak, it's to say, "Then you should probably move into the loft instead. I can...I don't know, crash with Artie for a while until I find my own place." _Or maybe just move back to Lima,_ he thinks. That might actually better for everyone involved. He can't bring himself to say it, though, because he'd miss Blaine way too much, and if there's any other way...

"I mean, obviously that occurred to me. And I guess I could say that it was the principle of the thing, that I was so outraged by the idea that Kurt thinks he can dictate who I'm friends with... But actually, it's just that...the thought of not living with you anymore—even though I'm 100 percent clear on the fact that we can only ever be friends—made me sadder than the thought of not marrying Kurt."

"Blaine, I had no..."

"And I realize it might be pathetic of me. Probably...almost definitely is, in fact. But I think it's the right choice. Cause I was being glib when I said Kurt dumped me; it was my choice. I could have said, 'You're right, I don't want to make you uncomfortable, of course I'll move back into the loft,' but I didn't. And the fact that I chose you over him, even though it was platonically, it's a pretty good sign that I shouldn't marry him. Don't you think?"

Sam really thinks about it, and the best answer he can come up with is, "I'm not sure." He's had his reservations about Blaine and Kurt's relationship before, but, aside from that initial attempt to talk Blaine out of proposing to Kurt when he was still in high school and the two of them weren't even together, he's always kept them to himself. It's never seemed like his place, especially when they were engaged. Even now...what if the engagement isn't really _off_ , what if this is, like, just a break?

"Well. I'm sure," Blaine says, though he doesn't totally sound like he is. "I kinda didn't want to tell you all this because I knew it would probably make you uncomfortable."

"No, of course it—"

"But I thought you should know now. Because it would probably come out at some point anyway, so you should know _before_ we sign a lease together somewhere. You were so great when you knew about my crush in high school, and I know you said you weren't uncomfortable about it and I believe you, but we weren't living together then. So you should really think about it, you know? If it _would_ make you uncomfortable living with me, then we'll...I don't know, we'll figure something out. I can always move into the dorms, and...I mean, you _could_ go back to that apartment with the other models, right? They're not gonna _make_ you start taking pills or anything, and you're strong enough to resist. And we'll figure out something for McConaughey too, just..."

"You would move into the dorm rather than the loft?"

"Well, yeah. I just told you I'm sure that Kurt and I breaking up is the right thing."

"Oh. Well then..."

"Don't decide anything right away. Sleep on it. Okay?"

"Okay."

But Sam certainly can't sleep now. He lies in bed until he's sure Blaine is asleep, and then he gets up. McConaughey paws at the kennel door, and Sam doesn't want him to wake Blaine, so he decides to take the dog for a late-night walk. It's weird walking a dog late at night in New York. It's weird how not-deserted their block is and how no one thinks a guy in rumpled clothes walking a tiny dog after midnight is odd. The apartment is quiet when they get back—Sam is glad he didn't wake Blaine or Mercedes when he went out, so he stretches out on the couch and holds McConaughey on his chest. McConaughey conks out pretty quickly while getting his head scratched. Sam is still wide awake.

The thing is... God, there are so many things. His brain kind of can't handle them all at once.

The main thing is that he's pretty sure he likes Blaine too. _That way._ It took him so long to figure it out last year. He wasn't _quite_ there, in fact, when Blaine announced his plan to propose. Almost, though. Enough to realize that it was probably selfish of him to object, so he stopped objecting. He didn't want to stand in the way of Blaine's happiness, and if Blaine was actually in love with Kurt and his thing for Sam had just been a passing crush...well, then it was best for Sam not to say anything. Not to say anything and not to even think about it, because it was probably just a phase on his part anyway. Right?

He's managed to not think about it constantly, but he can't _never_ think about it. He thinks about it enough to realize it wasn't just a phase.

It just really sucked because Blaine and Kurt were engaged, so it was impossible to do anything about it.

When Mercedes came to New York, though, it wasn't impossible with her. Or so he thought. She'd been his first love and circumstances beyond their control had kept them apart, but now he had another chance with her (or so he thought), so he had to go for it. Go for something possible instead of pining after someone unavailable and uninterested.

But now to find out that Blaine's crush wasn't passing? And that maybe they could have a chance after all?

But...isn't that the same mistake he _just_ realized he'd made with Mercedes? Trying to make up for a missed chance?

But he really, really likes Blaine. Is even in love with him, maybe.

But that's what he thought about Mercedes. Didn't he? At the time, when he asked her to give the two of them another chance? He can't actually remember feeling that way now, but he must have. He's pretty sure.

And anyway he doesn't know how to be with a guy.

Like...not just sex. He actually has a pretty good idea how the mechanics of that would work, because, like, Blaine hasn't always been super careful about the windows he's left open on his laptop, and Sam has been curious about what kinds of things Blaine's into, so...

So it's not just the idea of sex with a guy that confuses him, but, like...other stuff. He doesn't even know what, specifically. He knows that neither of them would have to be "the girl" and, like, let "the guy" hold doors open and pay for everything. It's more like...he doesn't know if he's supposed to suddenly act like a different person, somehow. If he has to _be_ a different person. Or maybe he already is a different person than he was, and he just has to "come out"?

All these thoughts keep cycling through Sam's head for hours after McConaughey has fallen asleep on his chest. Somehow Sam eventually drifts off too, without having figured anything out.

~o0o~

Blaine wakes up early. Well, he half-wakes early, in a way that would normally lead to him turning onto his other side and going right back to sleep. But this morning when he rolls over he glances over at Sam's bed, and Sam isn't in it. Maybe McConaughey was fussing so Sam had to take him out? But Blaine's pretty sure he would have heard if that had been the case. So, with a sinking feeling in his stomach, he gets up to see what's going on.

His stomach isn't really sinking any more when he sees Sam sleeping on the couch—it's much more of a free-fall at that point. He shouldn't have said anything. He's made Sam unable to even sleep in the same room with him anymore. McConaughey, however, has no such reservations; he lifts his head at the sound of Blaine on the stairs and starts thumping his tail.

"Shh!" Blaine whispers, though he's sure McConaughey doesn't understand. He rushes over as quickly as he can without being too loud and gingerly picks the dog up off of Sam. Then he carries him upstairs, sets him down on Sam's bed while he throws some clothes on, and tiptoes back downstairs with McConaughey tucked under one arm and the leash in his other hand.

McConaughey poops about half a block into the walk, and Blaine just stands there and starts to cry. An older lady walking a floofy little poodle wearing a bow asks him what's wrong, and he gestures at the poop and says, "I forgot to bring a bag!" She gives him one and walks on, and he cleans up after McConaughey, still crying.

Picking up dog poop is super gross. He'd probably never get used to doing it. It's probably just as well that Sam doesn't want to be his roommate now. That's what Blaine tells himself, anyway. He manages to stop crying before he gets McConaughey home.

He opens the front door and Sam is there seconds later, disheveled and slightly panicked-looking. "Blaine? Have you seen... Oh, thank god!" He scoops McConaughey up and ruffles his fur. "I was afraid you got into Mercedes's room somehow!"

"Doesn't Mercedes sleep with her door closed?" Blaine asks, knowing that she does.

"Oh, yeah. I just woke up and he wasn't there and so I freaked out and I barely slept so I wasn't thinking real clearly."

Blaine unhooks the leash from the dog in Sam's arms. "I'm sorry you couldn't sleep."

Sam shrugs. "I just had a lot to think about."

"Yeah. And I'm sorry I told you...you know, what I did."

"Don't be sorry, I'm glad you told me!"

"I mean, I know that, like, ethically...morally it was the right thing to do, but..."

"I'm just not totally sure what I want to do now," Sam says.

"Yeah." Blaine nods. Part of him wants to cling to the possibility implicit in that statement that _maybe_ Sam will still want to share an apartment with him. But most likely Sam is just trying to cushion the blow. "But I mean, you can just say it if you already know you want to forget about the getting-an-apartment-together idea."

"Dude!" Sam sets McConaughey down and touches Blaine's arm. "Why would I want to forget about that?"

"Like, for the obvious reason?"

"What obvious reason?"

Blaine studies his friend. He's pretty sure Sam sincerely doesn't know what he means. However, Blaine can't bring himself to just come out and state the obvious reason. "What is it you're not sure about then?"

"If I'm ready to...you know. Be your boyfriend."

Blaine stares at Sam in stunned silence. Sam looks at the floor for a long time, but eventually raises his eyes to meet Blaine's. Blaine says, "Sam, I'm not asking you to be my boyfriend."

"Oh." Sam's face flushes and he touches his neck. Looking at the floor again, he says, "Duh. I don't know why I thought... I mean, why _would_ you want that?"

"Sam..."

"But what _did_ you mean then? You said _feelings_. Did you mean just, like, sex feelings?"

"No! I mean, yes, but not _just_ —"

"Because I don't think I could do just sex with you. Or friends with benefits or whatever."

"I'm not asking you to have sex with me."

"Then what _do_ you want?"

Blaine wonders if Sam thinks Blaine is actually rejecting him. "In my dreams, I'd love that. Sex and being boyfriends both."

"Then why not in real life?"

"Um. Because you're straight?"

Sam runs a hand through his hair. "I'm not sure."

"You're not sure if...if you're straight?"

"I mean, I guess I'm sure that I'm not...not completely 100 percent anyway, because...because I really like the idea, too. You know, the boyfriends idea. And the sex idea."

Blaine is speechless. He literally cannot produce words.

After an uncomfortable silence, Sam goes on. "I'm just not totally sure it would work in real life. I mean, I've never tried it with a guy before—or with anyone I cared about so much before, honestly—and I'm a little scared to try. But...I think I'm scareder to not try."

"So..." Blaine's brain struggles to make sense of what Sam is saying. "You're not completely straight. And you want to try being boyfriends. With me. You think. And having sex. Again, with me. Maybe."

"We should probably wait a while for sex. I mean, I _want_ to, but, like, even with Brittany I didn't do it on the first date. And you're a guy and that's totally new to me, so..."

"Uh, yeah. We can wait as long as you want."

"But I won't make you wait as long as Mercedes was gonna make me wait."

Blaine chuckles nervously.

"That's not what this is all about though! It's not about Mercedes not wanting to... I hope you know that."

"I assume you'd try to pick up a girl if that were all it was."

"Yeah, probably. I mean, I don't really know what I'm doing with girls, but at least I have some idea."

"So..." Blaine's not sure where anything stands now. "You do want to keep looking for an apartment?"

"For sure. Definitely. Don't you?"

"Yeah. Absolutely."

"And..."

"And," Sam says. "And I have feelings for you too. I have since...well, I never said anything because of Kurt, but...anyway, I think I'd like to try to be more than friends, but only if we can be sure that we'll still always be at least friends, no matter what, because I couldn't stand to lose that."

Blaine thinks about that for a minute. "I don't know that we can be _sure_ , though. I mean, we're Blam, so of course we'll always be friends, but...I mean, nothing is guaranteed, right?"

"Right. I guess. But, like, if we go real slow? Like...a date. Let's go on a date tonight. Okay? If it's a disaster then we go right back to being just friends and we never speak of it again. Okay?"

Wow. Sam actually, really wants to try this. It's what Blaine's wanted for so long, even when he was telling himself it wasn't. It's also a huge risk. Sam's never dated a guy before. Going back to being friends after dating doesn't always work out, so how would being _roommates_ after dating work out?

But...like Sam said, Blaine is more scared not to try it. He nods and says, "Yeah. It's a date."

 **A/N: Just for the record, I am of the strong opinion that in almost every context,** ** _all right_** **should be spelled as two words.**


End file.
